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Have you ever asked your child to do something simple, like pack their toys away before dinner? For a second they stare back and you wide-eyed, all chubby-cheeked cherubic sweetness. And then they scrunch those eyes and tell you to $#@ off? oh no, she didn’t… Kids who cuss are more common than you might think. If you put those terms into any search engine results throw up videos full of kids swearing. Some people, apparently, find kids swearing hilarious. Others not so much. And as we share on the podcast this week where you are on the parenting swearing spectrum has much to do with how swear words showed up in your own childhood. This week we’re talking about why some kids swear with glee and other kids, well meh, they’d rather go draw a comic. We’re talking the parenting shame and humiliation that happens when your kid swears and what you can do. We’re talking about getting light around swearing while at the same time setting limits on sassy language. And we’re talking about how swearing can offer fertile grounds for connecting. Yes, you read that right, you can use swearing to bring you closer. try a little four-letter […]
You sink down on the rug in tears and wonder how you can ever keep going. Then you see your daughter’s abandoned stuffie under the sofa, next to an overdue library book, so you scoop them out, tuck them on the shelf, shove your hair in a bun, and get started with the laundry. What happened to your tears? You discarded them like your daughter did her stuffie. Welcome to mom overwhelm. Mom overwhelm is the science of feeling crushed by the weight of life and living it anyway! This week, we’re making space for overwhelm and talking about the ways we can bust through it. If you feel like a cog in a wheel of making breakfast and answering email and rushing to activities and getting laundry done and finding lost library books and washing bodies and reading story books and wait, when did you last really see your partner? Listen in. quick smart tips to conquer your mom overwhelm Today we talk turning that overwhelm around… Why is overwhelm like eating a really hot curry Why modern life creates a perfect environment for overwhelm to flourish How to cultivate walk away moments Why you need to listen to warnings as whispers and see if […]
Read on to learn why it pays to keep positive with your kids “Last cookie,” you say, lightly. “No.” Your son says. Then he stuffs the cookie into his mouth, grabs three more and runs from the room.  You’re just about to charge from the kitchen in a chase when your eyes fall on another set of eyes. Your younger son. Wide-eyed and wondering.  Who’s in charge here? his eyes seem to say. How far can we push you? Are you going to…lose it?  This week we’re talking the kid that pushes your buttons…and the brothers and sisters who are watching.  How does what you say or do in the heat of the moment reflect on them? Abigail shares a big win when she got her over-tired tween to bed early, despite his resistance at every opportunity. But what surprised her most was how her younger son responded. Listen in and feel inspired if you: Struggle with keeping calm in Staylistening Feel like one of your kids is playing you or pushing your buttons Get sucked into debate and reasoning with your child when you set a limit You feel like one child takes up so much more of your energy […]
The baby woke at 4am. His brother just 45 minutes later. Since then you’ve been puked on, drawn on, and changed three diapers. You burnt a bagel and your kid tipped his cereal over in a rage. Now the baby is screaming because he’s hungry and your son is pulling at your pants leg because he wants to play. Oh yeah. And it’s only 7.53am. Who you gonna call? Ghostbuster’s won’t help. But there is someone else. A special person who will let you scream about how bad your morning has been, and gently tell you they understand. Who will nod sympathetically and not judge you when you say that you are Just.Too.Tired.To.Play! Who will laugh with you when you admit, embarrassingly, that you just wanted to fling that dumped out cereal bowl across the living room, pick up your bag and walk out of there forever. (Or at least just until you’d had a mani-pedi/shopping binge/peace and quiet.) If you know Hand in Hand Parenting then you know that when the going gets tough we call…a listening partner. There’s no other place that offers quite the same level of support, care and nurturing when you are at the end of […]
The last time you asked them to tidy their crayons, they smashed the whole box on the floor and ripped up the color sheet. You have to psyche yourself up when you need them to turn off the TV, because…BOOM! Epic meltdown. Forget about asking for a hug. Your child wriggles away from your hand on his shoulder. Does every request you make send your child into a raging meltdown? You spend life walking on eggshells. (As well as Lego bricks.) But, do you know what? This is actually when your child needs you most of all. But how do you get close when your child acts like a tiny tyrant, doing everything they can to push you away? When it’s hard to even be in a room with them? you need to get close when your child pushes you away. here’s why. This week, Abigail and Elle show you how to maximise a special tool you can use when you want to transform meltdowns into closeness and co-operation. Use it to stop power battles and turn your child’s difficult, defiant behaviors around. On the podcast this week: Learn what your child’s ongoing acts of aggression and rage are showing […]
Do you know how bad your child feels when they mess up? They may look angry. They may look amused. They may show bravado. But in every kid that messes up is a pit of shame, sadness, confusion and doubt about their own self-worth. How do we know? Because aren’t those the exact same feelings we adults feel when we mess up – when we really look inside? And we parents often heap on that shame. You get into blame and guilt, lectures and stand-offs. Just the way you were treated when you were little. If you want to avoid the stand-offs, forced apologies, shame and humiliation we experienced when we messed up, we need new tools and new responses. This week we share three ways to respond that will actually build trust and empathy with your child – whether mistakes are big or small! Discover 3 Responses You Can Use To Build Trust and Avoid Shame On this week’s podcast, we’re talking mistakes – when you make them and when your kid makes them. Listen in for: Why confrontation and blame only builds kids shame and self-loathing Why empathy isn’t a soft response when it comes to mistakes Why […]
How do you make like Meghan Markle and stand strong when you face loud and opposing opinions on how you *should be* raising your child? Meghan and Harry have broken many a protocol since bringing royal baby Archie into the world, from not using the royal family’s preferred hospital to Harry holding Archie at a (delayed) press call. No-one is telling them how to raise a prince, not even the queen! How About You? How can you get the same support from your family when your ideas about parenting differ from theirs? How you can avoid endless confrontations and feuds? How can you stand strong when their feelings rock you and you face indecision and uncertainty about your parenting style? Hand in Hand Parenting can seem very different to an older generation, and even younger friends and family that find mainstream parenting practices successful for them. So, how can we show the differences in a positive light without alienating anyone? Listen to this episode and find out how to own your parenting when your family wants to rule over you. Why your parenting ideas rub moms and mom-in-laws up the wrong way and how you can ease this One easy […]